Such a good question.
I mentioned in one of my earlier posts that sometimes I can be too judgmental and critical of others. And I honestly don't even know if it's something I do to feel better about myself or if I just like to be a brat sometimes. [Probably a little of both.] But I hate it. And I constantly have to remind myself to think positively about others and that they are a child of God. That even if I don't necessarily like a person, there is always something good that I can say about them.
Obviously you don't have to be friends with everyone you come in contact with. Sometimes there are just people that you really don't get along with. But why does that mean that you have to be rude to them and talk crap? Oh wait-- IT DOESN'T.
I'm not saying that I have never spoken a bad word about anyone before... [Trust me, I've done more than my fair share.] I just have always thought it was ridiculous because, first of all, if someone is talking crap to you about someone else, you know that they are talking crap about you to someone else. You know? It has always been this way. High school, work, church; Pretty much anywhere that you have a group of girls.
And I'm sorry, but like... What gives you the right? What gives any of us the right to judge others? We don't know what has happened in their lives to make them the way they are. And how do YOU feel when someone spreads a rumor about you? Or when you find out that someone has been saying bad things about you? I know that I feel really awful. Why would I want to make someone else feel that way?
I'm not trying to make it seem like I'm perfect in this area. Clearly I'm not. A lot of times I will be the first to make fun of someone else. But I'm not proud of it. And I am working on changing the way I've programmed my brain to work. Because that's honestly what I believe it is. That I've programmed my mind to notice all of the bad things about a person, before it notices the good things. [I know for a fact that my little 8 year old brain didn't think like that!] And I think it would do us all some good if we tried to redirect our minds to the positive and uplifting thoughts that we think when we see others--or even when we look at ourselves! Yeah, maybe you should have washed your hair two days ago, but DANG look how hot you look in that outfit! You know?
Most of you know, I left my job at a Doctor's Office to work as a nanny. Being with children all the time, and hardly ever interacting with adults had made me realize how much I don't miss it. At least not the drama aspect of it. It's nice, sometimes, to take a step back from your life and really examine the way you were living it. I definitely do not admire the parts of me that are critical of others [and of myself!]
I have made a lot of mistakes in my life. Mistakes that I definitely do not like to be reminded of, because I've moved on. I've been married in the temple to my best friend, and my life couldn't be more perfect. And I know everyone is this way. Every one of us has something in our past that we don't want to be reminded of, so why do we make others miserable by judging them and never letting their mistakes go?
We have all had days where we wake up late and have to rush out the door, with no time to put on makeup or wash our greasy hair. So why judge others when they aren't completely put together? You know? It just doesn't make sense to me. Because guess what? You can't change anything about anyone else.
So I think that when it comes to being critical, maybe we should all just focus a little bit more on ourselves, and a little less on others.
Here are a few of my favorite quotes...
And trust me, this post was as much for me as it was for all of you.